Why is it so difficult to be a feminine ?

Im not pink and girly, im not masculine, I love to wear nice clothes and to look attractive and feminine in an arty way: dresses, red lipstick, eyeliner....It makes me feel good- its for me. I like women who have a similar style- and they usually are straight or have boyfriends. Guys always try it on with me in clubs when Im dancing and declare their love after meeting me at a party- i hate that and tell them I dont want! Other s of the butcher variety scowl at me in gay bars and make snide comments. Everyone thinks Im a biual. But now I have decided that I am 100 % queer. Im sick of saying I don't know if Im this or that anymore. Its like Ive been hiding from being exposed.I dont want to be The crap , boring, awkward, serious, novelty. Also LGBT groups are rubbish. I get dissed for not having a mullet and being too straight orientated. Am I phobic? Where can I find girl world of the lush lovely lessers, and gay fashion designers??